Recently in The Slatest

1. Why Michael Cohen’s Influencer Daughter Is Coming Up in the Trump Trial
2. What More Can Michael Cohen Do to Donald Trump?
3. Enjoy This Tale of a Low-Stakes Campus Screwup That Has Nothing to Do With the Middle East
4. Mitt Romney Has a Wild Theory About the TikTok Ban

What a week! First, we learned that, according to Attorney General William Barr, Robert Mueller’s special counsel investigation “did not establish that members of the Trump Campaign conspired or coordinated with the Russian government in its election interference activities.” For years, Americans had wondered whether Mueller would find evidence that the president had colluded with Russia—and many had expected, even hoped, that he would. But, at least at this point—pending the release, just announced by Barr, of a more complete version of the report by “mid-April, if not sooner“—it seems that it was not to be.

France, meanwhile, had better luck in solving itsmost pressing national mystery. As this AFP story explains, “For more than 30 years bright orange ‘Garfield’ phones have been washing up on the French coast.” But now, it seems, a “local beach cleaning group”in Brittany has been able to confirm—after what its leader described as a “very, very dangerous” expedition into a cave that’s only accessible at low tide—that the phones have been leaking out of a shipping container, presumed to have been lost in the 1980s, that is “wedged” inside the cave.

France 1, America 0.

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